By Beth Marino
MASSACRE IN THE BASEMENT OF OLD QUINCY!!!!
HALF OF MATRIZA WIPED OUT BY THE SUPERIOR STALKING SKILLS OF SARAH SPIEGEL AND TONI CALBERT, HONORABLE MEMBERS OF THE SPAWN OF THE PREACHER MAN.
After spending the afternoon at their second floor window, frightening
their foes away from their own front door, Sarah and Toni took their post
in an empty room in the basement of B entry just before the end of the amnesty
this evening...ready, waiting for their opponents in the dank dark to redeem
the honor of their much maligned clan. After an hour at their post with no
movement, Sarah decided to make an undeniably risky move to the porter closet
at the foot of the B-entry stairs. In spite of the hideous smell, the confined
quarters, Sarah endured further waiting.
She heard footsteps clumping clumsily up the stairs, after a furtive whisper,
"we're safe," she leapt out, living up to her nickname of Sarah "RAMBO" Spiegel
(check out that facebook picture) and delivered a death blow to Matriza clan
member Humayun Khalid who had earlier taunted Spawn members with a mocking
wave of his unwieldy weapon of mass destruction at the foot of the dining
hall. Once she had displayed her superior shooting skills, Rambo Spiegel rushed
back to her comrade who was still stalking in their basement lair.
CONFUSION ENSUED!!!!
Well meaning dead Spawn were just then coming to deliver sustenance to their
brave fighters, as they entered the pitch black room they heard the urgent
whispers of Toni, "what the fuck are you doing? we just killed a Matriza!"
Suddenly, screams erupted! Unthinkingly, two more members of Matriza, Brenna
Farrell and Darryl Li, stormed into the basement after their clanmember's
murderer. Tonisha "Bloodsucker" Calbert rushed out of her hiding place, brandishing
her primitive pump-action, one-arrow-at-a-time, weapon and quickly fired four
well-aimed shots to earn the long-awaited red x's for two more members of
the Matriza.
so, to those who scoffed: OUR LAUGHTER WILL RING OUT LONG AND LOUD AFTER YOUR
DEATHS... we are hardcore. be afraid... "the only one who could ever reach
me...THE SPAWN OF THE PREACHER MAN." yes he was.